Guest Contributor: Christine DaCosta
For so many years girls and women have been
pushed aside and told they should be silent, be small, be pretty, but not too
pretty. Be perfect, be a lady, be smart but not too smart. Basically, we girls
have walked around being told how to look, think, act and feel from the day we
were born. We are rarely invited to take up spaces. To grow. To Shine.
This is stifling to our growth in so many
ways. Who knows what gifts are being hidden away or what talent has gone
undiscovered. Who knows how much knowledge has gone silently to the graves of
millions of women, past and present, because they were not permitted to share
themselves with the world.
For hundreds of years women were allowed to be
seen and not heard. Women were accessories. Referred to as prizes but treated
like second class citizens. Not until recently have women begun to take back
their power; to stand tall, be loud, to define and take up space.
This all starts with us determining our worth
and putting that worth to work for us. I once said, “Girls are not consolation
prizes that grow up to be accessories to their male counterparts.” This is true
at home, at school and even in the workplace. I grew up knowing that I was
supposed to be small, pretty and quiet. I was urged, over and over again, not
to take up any space. That’s just not who I am. I am a beautiful, plus-sized
woman, I take up space and I do it big. I wasn’t always this way. I wasn’t
comfortable in my own skin. I wasn’t comfortable forming my own opinions and I
always had so much guilt when I tried. I fought with myself for years until I
realized that my calling was to speak up and be loud, to take up space and to
be unapologetic about it. I am not a mean spirited person. I am nice, assertive
and respectful. I simply know who I am, I know what I want and I will not
compromise that for anyone.
Everyone comes to their awakening, I guess you
could call it, differently and in their own time. Mine came in the form of
writing. I wrote a lot of poetry when I was in my late teens and early
twenties. I felt like I was locked in a cage and did not know the way out.
Writing was my way out; my escape. I encourage everyone to find their outlet,
find their voice and take up some space. Any form of self-expression works;
writing, painting, dancing, singing. Whatever sets your spirit free! The best
part is you’re doing it for you! It feeds your soul. It is a gift from you, to
the universe! Even if you feel like you don’t know what you’re doing, do it
anyway. Do it loud, proud and with confidence.
There were so many things I was afraid to do
when I was younger but being creative was the one thing that just came
naturally to me. I sang and danced, I expressed myself through theater. I
eventually wrote a lot of poetry and now I have a blog. My blog is a very real,
very public diary. I share it with the world, or for about 500 people that have
read it. I write mostly about female empowerment, but I also write other
personal things. They key is to take one step, however small, take that step. It’s
scary at first but it’s totally worth it.
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